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Honda's Hilarious April Fools' Anti-Theft System

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On: Tue, Apr 3, 2012 at 1:42PM | By: Chris Salamone

Honda's Hilarious April Fools' Anti-Theft System

Year after year, Honda consistently ranks highly in reliability and value. But another, less advertised, Honda attribute also tops some lists. Few automakers, in the history of cars, can attest to having a longer track record for attracting thievery. And even fewer still are the automakers which have mastered the art of April Fools’ advertising.

Honda usually spearheads the list of most stolen vehicles from the National Insurance Crime Bureau – but all that is about to change. Honda plans to address would-be criminals and nervous consumers in one fell swoop. In 2013, Honda vehicles will feature a new security technology which attempts to prevent theft with negotiations and psychoanalysis. Say hello to TERII, and what is perhaps the best April Fools’ joke in recent memory.

While TERII will offer some familiar features, like keyless entry and voice command, Honda’s latest anti-theft system is unlike anything currently available on the mass market. Meaning, buyers could pay top dollar to get a celebrity-like, aftermarket security unit, but Honda plans to make artificial intelligence security mainstream.

Once TERII is activated by an incorrect fingerprint scan or some other non-friendly activity, the software initiates one of five levels of negotiation relative to TERII’s perceived threat level. Level one involves logical reasoning and gentle guidance, with increasing response tone and tactics as the assailant or thief becomes more successful.

“Car alarms have become less and less effective as a deterrent,” said Sidney Finch, TERII Project Lead at Honda. “The technological advancements of late have been focused on the quick recovery of a stolen vehicle. Our goal was to prevent the theft in the first place. And we have that in TERII.”

Honda’s idea of theft prevention will manifest in various sensors throughout the vehicle, exterior speakers located above the wheel wells, and a long repertoire of 500 preprogrammed strategies. Whatever the scenario, TERII should have a proportionately targeted response.

And the best part: Honda’s recently released teaser video hints that the production version of TERII will have a sense of humor. One particularly hilarious response comes when a thief refuses to abandon his quest for shenanigans and TERII responds in a melodious monotone: “Have you ever been to prison? You will be traded for a pack of cigarettes.” Of course, Honda ends the clip with a beta testing disclaimer, offering a future out for controversial tactics.

The company claims that 10 years of engineering voodoo, harnessing FBI hostage negotiators and cognitive psychologists, were required to create TERII. Whatever the length of time, it seems likely at least one segment of Honda fans will be happy.


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