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Subaru Clear-Cuts Entire Electronic Forests For Its 2012 "Dynamic Brochures"

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On: Wed, Mar 7, 2012 at 11:30AM | By: Andrew W Davis

Subaru Clear-Cuts Entire Electronic Forests For Its 2012 "Dynamic Brochures"

Sorry, Subaru, but you were asking for it.

I'm a die-hard paper man—in most senses of the term—and as such I would rather get covered in toxic inks and be buried beneath tons of dried tree pulp than stare into this soulless flickering picture-box and “Face” or “Twit.”

So imagine my surprise when I discovered—admittedly via an online press release—that you are happy as all get-out with yourselves and your spiffy new “Dynamic Brochures” despite the fact that all you still have no way to even approximate the paper brochure “experience” electronically!

What if I wanted to find out the cargo capacity of a Legacy while the power was out? And how could I properly communicate the precise metallic blue that’s available on an Impreza WRX/STI to someone if all they have is a 1970s-era monochromatic monitor? Do you even have a way to help me help the Amish to be able to distinguish a Forester from an Outback?

I think not!

Yes, each dynamic brochure features “new, 360-degree interactive interior and exterior views that allow users to experiment with paint colors and interior trim” and “engaging demos, videos and high-quality photography.” And yes, they also include “comprehensive specifications so customers have every detail necessary to love and understand Subaru vehicles.” But I stand by my electricity-related qualms.

Not even “Sondra Shiffer, brochures manager for Subaru of America” [Did you even imagine such a position existed? Subaru did!] could sway me with her anti-lumberjacking rhetoric:

“Our dynamic brochures give our consumers interactive content they can use to compare models, learn about Subaru technology and share their findings with friends. This format allows car shoppers easy access to our product information and also reduces the amount of unnecessary printed material.”

And why is it that she can be so hateful to those of us who find paper cuts endearing?

"Our customers spend a considerable amount of time interacting with the cool videos and in-depth product information contained in the dynamic brochures," she says. "The average time spent on our web-based brochures ranges anywhere from 14 to 21 minutes. It's really exciting! We hope our viewers continue to enjoy them, and that they help our customers make more informed purchasing decisions."

[Damn your eyes, woman! Has it never even occurred to you that you have an entire line of vehicles called FORESTERS?!]

Ahem. Apologies.

Look, I’m obviously not Subaru’s demographic no matter what form their “brochures” may take, so I’ll leave final judgment up to you. But promise me—if YOU are Subaru material—that you’ll at least humor me and pick up a paper version, too.

Otherwise you’ll force me to twitter your face or some such thing that will make us both uncomfortable. Heck, I’m uncomfortable just THINKING about it, and I don’t even know what that means!




Impreza WRX/STI





dwalter | 4:44PM (Wed, Mar 7, 2012)

pretty cool! saves a trip to the dealership for one too

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